Hey, have you heard the news?
I have a new website! It's called Cash and Joy and its mission is to increase the awesomeness of the world - of course - through glorious and meaningful marketing.

Why did I focus on marketing? Because marketing can be the most fun and meaningful activity of your business instead of the most dreaded and icky... if you do it right.

An Inconvenient Depression

Two mornings ago, after a month of punishing work schedules and a sudden dramatic shift into winter, I woke up with the most vicious black-dog depression I’ve experienced in years.

I occasionally have days of mild depression, usually tied in to the available light levels. In winter, or after three days of heavy overcast, it will sneak in at times; but I’ve been managing Seasonal Affective Disorder for so long that my symptoms are usually mild. To me it feels like the emotional and mental (and sometimes physical) equivalent of the first day when you’re coming down with the flu. Everything is tiring and leaden and effort is oh-so-hard, with a strong need to sit somewhere comfortable and watch season 1 Angel boxsets. I can usually push through it, distract myself, or slowly and grudgingly perform the work that will help. They’re not fun days, and most emotions feel like their coming through cotton wool, but you could talk to me for five minutes and notice nothing, other than “Catherine’s a bit low-energy today.”

Two mornings ago was not like that.

Every emotion had vanished but one: in an interesting inversion of Pandora, the only feeling left in the box was despair. Otherwise I was aware that I cared for people, logically, but I couldn’t feel it at all.

Of course, this was the worst timing ever. I’m less than two weeks away from my first big launch and accordingly I’d made a dozen commitments, with three important ones due at the end of the day. And there was NO WAY I was going to get them done.

I tried, knowing that any work I managed to complete would help. The completed cover art had arrived, drawn by the oh-so-kind-and-generous Willie Hewes and while the uncoloured draft had made me giggle with glee, the finished version just seemed… wrong. I spent an hour in Photoshop trying to combine it with the name. Every combination of positioning, font, sizing, effects… it all sucked. (And incidentally my skin didn’t fit right, either.)

I abandoned it and just sat. Eventually, The Dude came in and helped me. He started trimming and equalising the interview files, he made sure I was warm and that I ate food and was very, very patient while I spoke mostly gibberish and tried not to cry. I watched a movie, read three books, loaded up a computer game and watched him play it. And I sent a couple of emails factually advising why my work would be later than anticipated. I Got Through The Day. It was all I could do.

In which Catherine made an understandable but possibly unwise decision

One of the reasons I have been pushing so hard with this resource is that I’ve been dreading this. Kevin and I decided to start this website a year ago, but we didn’t go live until November. Do you know why? I knew that starting something as big as a website in the middle of winter would kill me. My depression has been mild for the last few years, because I have been smart enough to go very gently in winter. I cut back my hours at work, I get at least an hour of sun every day, I play a lot of World of Warcraft. Because trying to do more breaks me.

But here I am, two weeks away from the start of official winter (a time, before I was diagnosed with Seasonal Affective Disorder, when I lost three jobs due to exhaustion and depression), working 16 hour days. Am I totally insane?

Yes and no. It’s silly, so silly, to put all my eggs in one basket… but I know that if this resource sells enough copies I can quit my Day Job. And then I don’t have to try doing both. Without the Day Job I can sleep in as I need to, get sun as I need to, and still spend six or more hours a day on the website. If I have to try to do both? Well, daily posting will be impossible. A lot of other things would have to go. At the time when I’m really starting to develop momentum, I’d have to slow down. Maybe that would kill the business, or maybe that would just condemn me to one incredibly sucktacular winter.

So, in order to avoid crippling depression and delays, I gave myself a dose of crippling depression and delay that is still affecting me on the third day. Irony!

I’m very concerned that it will happen again before the 28th… I still have a LOT of work to do, and almost all of it needs to be very high quality to help me achieve my goal: selling enough copies of the resource that this is the last ever winter where I have to do this. Working only for myself gives me the freedom to work from home, or in the northern hemisphere (And oh yes, I want to do that. Avoid winter entirely for the rest of my life? Yes, please.) or to have the occasional black-dog day without bringing everything undone.

And that would be the best birthday present I could ever think to give myself.

Why I’m writing this

Not to gain sympathy, dearests, I don’t need any. And definitely not for kind advice, which I really don’t need. Why then?

Because I doubt I’m the only one who struggles with this. Because I want you to understand why I want this product to succeed so much. And because it feels good to have it said.

Thanks for listening to it. Come talk in the comments and talk to me, okay?

  • http://twitter.com/AlexiaPetrakos Alexia

    You are so not alone here. Just know that & be kind to yourself. :) *hugs*

  • Debbie Ferm

    You are SO not the only one who deals with this. Minnesota almost guarantees a sucktacular winter every year with the frickin bracing cold and zero sun to speak of. This winter was SO much better. I was working from home and would sit near the window to work and go out for a walk with the dogs every day no matter how cold it was.

    I have been in your shoes, and completely sympathize. Don't be too hard on yourself.

    I hope your launch is spectacular and would be happy to help in any way.

    Debbie

  • http://www.skajawills.com misty obrien

    i'm with Alexia…you're not alone. and you can reach out to any of us anytime. :)

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    Thanks Alexia. I could not do it without all of you. :)

  • http://kirstyhall.co.uk/blog/ Kirsty Hall

    My advice – be as gentle with yourself as you can be, this too will pass and you will feel better again. And IME, it's not usually the end of the world if things don't quite go according to plan, as long as you're upfront with people about it.

    Hope you get better soon, dear one.

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    Thanks Debbie. I know that Brisbane is likely much less problematic than Minnesota! But still enough to cause me problems.

    Thank you for the kind offer! If you can help spread the word when we go live that would be much appreciated.

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    Danke. :)

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    Ah yes, that would be the OTHER reason I wrote this post.

    I'm fighting my natural impatience hard and trying to give myself breaks. It's wicked hard though. :)

  • HannahCB

    Oh man, my inner slave-driver and goal-setter can be a maniac! And cunning too… She turns the most relaxing activities into ways to 'get stuff done'. Recognising the benefits and the drawbacks (oh, the drawbacks) of letting her tell me what to do all the time has been one of the most useful things ever.
    You have an amazing goal and like Alexia said, you're absolutely not alone. Whatever happens before the 28th, I wish you the best of luck and appreciate you sharing your journey :)

  • http://www.skajawills.com misty obrien

    i'm totally with Debbie, too. (i'm born and raised Minnesotan.)

    i know you know this, but take extra special care of yourself during the winter. keep your work area as bright as you can manage it, too. i notice that when my apartment is too dark, i tend to get negative a lot faster.

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    Good call! I shall make sure all the blinds are open.

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    Thank you, Hannah. :)

  • http://completeflake.com/ LaVonne Ellis

    I was worried that you were working yourself into a crash of some kind. Do you really have to stick to your self-imposed deadline? No one would be upset if you gave yourself more time, except maybe you. You know how much we all love you, don't you?

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    Yeah, but…

    :)

    I PROMISE to take it a bit slower and not break myself.

  • http://talkingshrimp.com/blog LBelgray

    Well, I think you know we're in the same canoe. The SAD thing…the getting all high on adrenaline and then crashing…the TV box sets. Every winter, I wonder how I'm going to face another winter. I think, “maybe this will be the last one, and someone will finally change things around here.” Wishing winters away hasn't worked yet.

    Did you ever see the post I wrote about buying a SAD lamp? Probably not. It was in the paleolithic era of talking shrimp. http://talkingshrimp.com/2009/11/20/sadly-mista

    Anyway, I feel ya, girl. And you won't be a failure if you delay the launch. I've seen my husband open several restaurants. Do you know how long they delay their openings? They'll tell the press they're opening in May and open in November. Of the following year. So. Do what keeps you from sinking into a black hole.

  • http://www.rosshudgens.com Ross Hudgens

    Love your honesty here, although I hate your condition. I think you want the product to succeed so much because you probably consider it a validation for a lot of your hard work – if it fails, it's somehow a reflection that the time was wasted. I don't think that would be true, even if it does (which I imagine it won't) – because you've built up a pretty cool audience by creating authentic, transparent posts like this.

    Whether they end up paying you on the first big attempt is hard to say, but when you thistle out the nuts and bolts, they'll reward you for kicking ass.

  • http://www.pattyk.com Patty K

    UGH. Depression sucks. You are *so* not alone on this. Take care of yourself. Hugs…

  • http://hypno.co.nz/blogs Mike Reeves-McMillan

    Dude, been there. (Didn't know what it was at the time, either, which is even scarier.)

    When you're further back out of the hole let's talk resources for not falling in so much in future.

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    Ha! I remember that post! I've been thinking of getting an lamp, but (IRONY) once I have a bit more money, aka after the launch.

    I know that people won't throw stuff at me in the street if I mess this up and launch late, but I WANNA. Times a zillion. Will restrain, if only to avoid Dr Drew. :)

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    I know it, even when I'm low. So comforting to hear from other people, too. :)

    I'm trying quite hard to not get Desperate about it, because we all know how well THAT turns out, but I'm not great yet at walking the line between Ambition and Gimme Gimme Gimme NOAW.

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    Thanks, Patty. Hugs back. :)

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    I'd like that. I've gotten excellent at keeping my falls shallow in the past, but usually by cutting back on activity. If we can figure out a way to Get Stuff Done without burning out, that would rock.

  • http://twitter.com/noelrasor Noel Rasor

    Just chiming in to say thanks for the openness as it's heartening to have recently discovered you and your awesome advice and to know that you struggle with this, too. It really makes your offerings take on even more meaning. I truly believe that the wiring that produces amazing creativity comes laden with these heavy byproducts. Personally I wouldn't trade it, but the hard days really just suck. Thanks for writing this.

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    Hi Noel, thank you so much for your kind words. I really don't mind the occasional black day when it's part of bringing me closer to wonderful people like yourself. :)

  • http://www.MavenDiary.com Wendy Maynard

    Are you doing your Couch to 5k and 100 pushups stuff? I know exercise always helps me when I am dealing with stints of depression. And ooooieeee do I know how bad that sucks when all of the color is just sucked out of the world.

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    Well, it got so COLD, see…

    I'll go tomorrow morning. I promise. :)

  • http://www.coachtia.com Tia Singh

    Oh hun! First off, huge congrats on getting started and inspiring others to get started, both on the website and the product. You know it will all be worth it in the end :)

    Hang in there and eat some Nutella! That's what gets me through Vancouver winters where it not only gets dark at 4pm but also RAINS for weeks on end. We (not so) fondly call it Raincouver.

    Take care and rest up a wee bit cos no matter how important this launch is to you, it's not 1/1000000th as important as YOU and your health xo

  • http://www.monagrayson.com Mona

    So many hugs to you. You and I could probably talk for hours on the phone about this kind of thing. It's a big deal. I know exactly what you're talking about with the seasonal connection to moods and patterns of health stuff and burn out. It's fascinating. And painful. And scary. And also a pathway to finding so much more LIFE in our lives. Thanks for sharing this part of your life. You're supported. You are loved.

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    (Note to self: do not move to Vancouver in winter.)

    Thanks Tia! I spent yesterday eating peppermint chocolate and playing computer games. The sun is back today and it feels much better. :)

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    *warm grin*

    Ooh, that helps. The sun is back out today and I'm surrounded by wonderful people. Depression, begone!

  • http://hypno.co.nz/blogs Mike Reeves-McMillan

    It shall be Rock O'Clock.

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    Somewhere in the world, it's ALWAYS Rock O'Clock. :)

  • http://www.lifeinweddings.com Shayna Walker

    You're not alone. You're definitely not alone. Thank you for sharing so bravely – you will help others with your story.

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    Thanks Shayna. That was a big reason to write this post.

  • http://janebradbury.com/ Jane Bradbury

    Must be something in the water; I was ready for packing it all up yesterday. I hope today has been better for you. :o )

  • http://awakenyoursoul.wordpress.com/ Peggie

    Oh Dear Catherine. sigh. I feel ya sister. Of course I get all giddy here in my hemisphere because well, it's finally almost summer. Just reading your post got me all worked up and wigged out about dreaded winter. and my seasonal crap. yuck.

    it also reminded me of that fleeting season before my first wedding when I had panic attacks. (should have been a sign, I know) I would have these attacks and thought I was dying. Then I'd finally gotten a name for them (panic attacks not paul and lucy) and I'd spend half the time in fear of when they were going to show up again. vicious cycle.

    nope, don't have any spectacular advice (which is good because you don't want it) but I'm glad you said it.

    and I'm coming back to read this from my winter darkness to remind me that summer is coming. and that I can manage a life where I spend the year in summer if that's what I really want.

    hugs,
    P

  • http://twitter.com/PeterAhrens Peter Ahrens

    It sounds like you want life without the day job. Keep going hard. I don't want to go back to my day job too, so this website I'm making has to work. Also agree with you, it's far too cold at the moment in Aus.

  • http://hypno.co.nz/blogs Mike Reeves-McMillan

    It shall be Rock O'Clock where YOU are.

    (I think of you and this shirt together for some reason.)

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    Yesterday was much better and today is better again. Bouncing back nicely!

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    A plan! We travel all year avoiding winter! Yay! :)

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    I went for a jog this morning (yay me and depression prevention) and it was 9 degrees. In Brisbane.

    WRONG.

    I think we both need to be careful of the “this HAS to work” thing. I know I've had a couple of times when I've started looking desperate, which is the single uncoolest thing ever. :)

  • http://www.toddweisscfa.com Todd Weiss

    Great post Catherine and thanks for sharing. Believe me I know how you feel as I have and will likely continue to deal with it. It's very common problem yet people are still not comfortable with the concept as they perceive it as a weakness versus an illness. Stress is the number one cause of health challenges. It probably felt good to share it. I admire the courage to write about it. Glad to comment and hear and look forward to speaking soon. Cheers, TW

  • http://awakenyoursoul.wordpress.com/ Peggie

    and just think of how much lighter our bags will be if we never need boots, woolen socks or overcoats. and the only scarves or gloves we pack will be fashion accoutrements. (I thought that was how you spelled it?)

    oh, and it occurred to me this afternoon as I mulled over this very wonderful post — that I often gear up and do massive production in the Fall – maybe we're like bears who are filling up for a necessary slow-down/hibernation? Maybe the massive work is necessary for a massive healing? who knows.

  • http://awakenyoursoul.wordpress.com/ Peggie

    really. 9 degrees. I'm so going around the world to avoid that.

  • Mike Korner

    Do not make me come over there and kick your awesome butt! :)

    Just thinking outside the box here, but as the queen of Awe-stralia, can't you just speak with Mother Nature to request a six week delay in the arrival of Winter? :)

    Seriously, take care of yourself!

    p.s. Hopefully you have a better Winter than we did. If not, perhaps we can all meet at that volcano in Iceland to roast marshmallows?

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    Thanks Todd.

    I had one guy in my life (not a friend any longer) who seriously DID NOT GET IT when I called to say I couldn't go to the movies because I was depressed. Eventually, I had to tell him it was like a stomach bug, but in my mind. :)

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    Mother Nature seems to be ignoring my calls. Very rude of her.

    Better, can we meet up in, say, Jamaica? New Calendonia? Hawaii?

  • Mike Korner

    Hawaii it is! :)

  • http://completeflake.com/ LaVonne Ellis

    No need to travel all year. Just move to San Diego. :)

  • http://twitter.com/PeterAhrens Peter Ahrens

    That's Celsius not Fahrenheit. It's been getting to -0.1C here. Ever so slightly below freezing.

  • http://www.BeAwesomeOnline.com Catherine Caine

    It's horrible!

  • http://www.engageyourstrengths.com wdaunheimer

    Aw Sweetie, I'm so sorry you've been having such a tough time of it. I still battle depression, though it took years and a good counselor to convince me of that. Now, at least I'm on a low dose of medication that helps. The scariest thing, which someone else here said, is that some people don't realize it until you've been in the throes of it for a while. I was one. I'm glad you aren't. There is power in knowing what it is and that it will pass.

    I completely get the drive to launch, and you know we'll support you however we can. Do you have anyone reviewing your draft and telling you regularly how Awesome you are? It's easy to get caught up in critiquing your stuff and having others as deep into it as you are critique it also. Then when you get in the dumps, all you see are the fixes you need to do instead of the terrific product you've developed so far. Just an idea. You could even give some folks (perhaps those on your advance list? totally selfish, of course) a sneak peek at the first section and see what the response it. I guarantee you it will be positive, and might start that energy flow back in a good direction.

    At any rate, take care. Remember that we love you!

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